I think I have commitment issues. No not the big kind either. I am very committed to my marriage and kids. I am talking about the small ones. The ones where someone will say, hey lets have lunch on Tuesday, I stutter, Do you want a play date on Monday? I panic. How about this one, I love to have my nails done, but I can't commit to being faithful going every two weeks so they usually look worse than the original! Its a problem . My sister begs me to come to NC,I say yes, when it gets closer,I can't. I never tell my children when I am going to take them to Disney,a movie or even the mall, I am too afraid I will not make it there, and then will have to explain why we aren't going. This is why they think I am so spontaneous, because I never fully commit until the moment we leave. This is a problem. I know there is a word for it. I have committed to my triathlon, the training, not so much! My one good friend always give me an out. She is so good to me! She know I will commit and then freak,so she has found a way for me to always have an exit strategy. This really works too, because I rarely, if ever, cancel on her, just knowing I have an out give me relief and the anxiety is gone. I think it is that I am afraid to disappoint anyone. I have a warped vision that this world (my world) will fall apart if I am not there to take care of it-its pure pride mixed with arrogance? a little. I realized I this was a problem when my baby girl did two things, wrote her cousin a letter and told her she was 97% sure we were coming, and yesterday she told her brother she was 95% sure he could sleep in her room! She is learning about the never fully commit syndrome. I don't want to pass this down to her! So, I am making you all a promise, I tell you I am committed to finding the solution! No more broken dates, lunches or trips, I am committed to a resolution! I will research, until I can figure out the answer! I am 80% sure I will do this tomorrow:)
BTW-the term is commitmentpobia or CP's -see I told you I wasn't making this stuff up!