Friday, March 7, 2008

Preserverance

Perseverance- This word is perfect for me. I think for the last few weeks I have been in a funk. One of those why bother stages. The, I didn't get to sign up for the Danskin (whine whine) so what the heck am I killing myself for? I guess after the last few weeks, I thought things were fine, except for one thing. I had given up not only on trying to complete a triathlon that I have been training for since August, but I had given up more importantly, on myself. Whew,that was hard to write.I had just decided, whats the point? I realized perseverance is continuing, pressing forward when we are ready to just quit, seeing it through to the end. It is about being true to oneself. Believing in oneself. I got lost along the way lately, but I went around a corner and stumbled upon my path once again.
It is funny how I had been buying into the lie that I was feeding myself, it was so easy to "slip"back into it. Usually is just creeps up on me without any warning. One day I feel strong, confident and sure, and then I let one incident destroy all that I had instilled in myself this year, all of the hard work swept under the rug. How did I get here again? I know how I got there because I have been here before, you know the old saying one step forward two steps back.
Perseverance is being steadfast. I think this is why I needed to go back to what my goal was, my mission was when I started out on this thing. If I would not have written it down, during these tough days ,I think I would have forgotten it, or let the wind take me somewhere else. The scripture that comes to mind is Heb 12:1 let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Your race may be different than mine,it probably is, whatever your race is, press forward , be steadfast and complete it! What have you been giving up on lately? a marriage, having a child, taking a class, a dream, a job, YOURSELF? Well, I challenge you to start today, get up and press forward. I encourage you to seek your mission, your goal ! You can not complete your race if you give up. Your race is as important as mine, and like mine there will be a finish line that you need to cross,but if you don't ever start, they take down the banners and all the people go home. Life is not meant to be painless, or joyless, it is meant to be lived with fullness, great anticipation and JOY!
I am officially signed up for my very first triathlon, it is April 5th.I want you to know this is a full month before the one I was originally training for, (isn't this so like God, you think I need more time,and he pushes you out there,saying no you don't, Your ready for this!) and guess what,I am ready to cross that finish line, to complete something that I have started, to know that I won (no not the triathlon)but that I won my race. There will be many more races for me to run throughout my life, but none will compare to my first one, the one that has taught me to stay true to myself, that I can and will be the woman I am called to be, that I will let no one, no circumstance, stop me from finishing my race. You may run along side me, I would love that, but if you can't, then kindly get out of my way, because I choose to experience life,running in the fast lane, taking the turns head on, with courage and strength knowing whom I belong to, not sitting on the sideline waiting for my turn, My turn is now! I am not naive enough to think that my race will be mapped out for me, with distances provided and a change of clothes,I have just decided that no matter what course, what distance I will persevere through this race called"life"!

2 comments:

D's Mom said...

I love you Brenda!! You hit the nail right on the head girl! I thank god that you are my friend.

Victoria's Secrets said...

Wow. I'm really proud of you, little sister. I'm supposed to be your role model, but you have ultimately been mine. I'm really proud of you. Run for all of us! I love you.